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April 29, 2009

 That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.  Romans 10:9


Every once in a while I feel as though I just don’t have what it is going to take to live fifty more years on this planet.  Ever feel that way?  Discouraged, defeated….just plain old tired? 

Recently, I caught up with an old friend and she shared that her mom had been saved.  My dad is saved, too!  I shared back.

Saved from what?  The question popped into my head as if from a cynical listener.  From hell, I thought firstly.  From eternal absence of God.  Because I am a list maker, I began to make a list.  Saved from…














To name a few.  No, the Bible doesn’t say that we will not struggle with these troubles while we live here on Earth. The way people treat one another here pains me so that I long for heaven, when all these battling feelings of our sinful flesh will be gone.  I have a hard time explaining that to my head, but I know without a doubt that it is true.  Heaven is without sin, without sorrow.  Best of all, it is with Jesus. 

Let me tell you, these last few days I have been longing for Jesus!   I know He is here, everywhere.  I can pray my heart out and virtually crawl into his lap for a good cry.  I believe He sees the true reason for my sadness, and He loves that my heart is still soft in a hard world.

But what I long for is more, something I cannot even comprehend.  My five year old, Soleil often says, “I know what Jesus is doing right now.”


“He’s preparing a place for us.”  

“That’s right!”

Yes, I long for heaven.  No, I do not have a death wish.  I pray daily to be able to live a long life with my family.  I’m a mom! 

But there are some times when as much as I know Jesus is here, I want more.  On days like this, I understand more fully what it is I am saved from.  I stop to praise God that I am saved from ever being separated from Him.   And then, without fail, come the gentle reminders of the glimpses of heaven I’ve already had. 

The absolute peace I feel when my husband holds me.

The joy and spontaneous laughter that comes from watching my daughters dance with total abandon.

The love that overflows in my heart when one of my girls puts aside her desires to bless someone else.

Even the awe of God I experience when I bite into a fresh piece of fruit.  The sweetness, the color, the texture.  All so pleasing.  From the ground.  Amazing!

Yes, there are many glimpses of heaven in this depraved world. What I am longing for, God has plopped right into my life.  And the promise of an eternity with Jesus and without all the yucky stuff…that helps too.


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